THIS THING CALLED MALICE

It dawned on me one evening that I had replied severally to my friend's WhatsApp status and I didn't get any reply, that was strange.

I was wondering if my friend was good, so I decided to call and there was no response again.

I came back online and noticed recent status updates like 1 minute ago.Sent mesages again, no reply.

At this point I needed no one to tell me there was a problem.

I began to search myself, maybe I offended,
I was wondering if I said something wrong or if I did something wrong.

I won't and can't rule out the fact that I am human and in as much as I try not to offend people, I still do.

Infact I've realised rating anyone as 'offence- less' is only killing yourself. So you see we all offend people directly or indirectly.

I just kept searching and questioning myself, but I couldn't trace it to anything. We had no issues, the last time we had spoken well.

I contacted a mutual friend but it didn't help.

I finally found strength to 'let it be', but honestly I felt bad about it. The calls were not returned nor messages replied.

This was my friend, one I would boast is pretty much a good friend, we had done so much together and suddenly you just stop talking for no reason.

It was hard to take but well....

After about two months, I decided to take the bull by the horn and call.
Luckily this time, I got a response.

After much persuasion my friend said a statement I made hurt him.

This was two months after! The statement was a joke and something I quickly would have apologised over if I knew he found it offensive.

I apologised but unfortunately it hasn't been the same again even though I truly have forgiven and I hope I was forgiven too. If we talked about it immediately it probably wouldn't have gotten this bad.

The lesson I drew from this was the importance of communication in relationships, be it a romantic relationship, colleagues, roommates whatever kind of relationship it is.

Its really important people know how you feel. I know some will flair up in the process but there is a peace that comes when you air these feelings out.

I feel many relationships fail because we do not talk issues out but rather give the 'silent treatment' I doubt it has helped anyone.

God in his wisdom has given us mouths to speaks and not keep silent. Mouths to express to talk to one another and not keep malice, you may not realise but its killing your relationship without you realizing.

I acknowledge it may be difficult to talk to people who have wronged you but would you rather add salt to the injury?

Create a conducive environment for such discussions, keep your tone down, go with the mindset of peace and not war.

People may prove difficult but at the end of the day your efforts will give you liberation that you tried to communicate.

Don't let lack of communication be the hindrance in your relationship, don't assume. COMMUNICATION IS KEY!

Malice goes beyond not talking to someone. It actually means INTENTIONALLY inflicting pain on another person.


Peradventure your are keeping malice, you may need to call or visit the person in question. Remember above all 'pursue peace with all men'


I hope this was worth your time?

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Until next time, remember you are Majestic!


-Adoo Atera